Hello baby boy...

Hello son, I miss you! Here lately I have felt that you are closer than ever and I love that. As I am sitting here writing to you I can hear your wind chime right outside the window. It sings to me the sweet melody of you playing in your garden, right here beside me. I love feeling you near me. It always makes me feel safe and warm. I do wish more than ever that I could hold you and kiss you again, but I am happy with just knowing you are staying close. Your brother's arrival is getting near and I am getting very anxious and scared. I am so ready for him to be here and so scared that something might happen to him too, sometimes it is too much to handle. But I am hanging in there. I love you baby boy. Keep watching after your little brother and stay near us. We love you and miss you sweet angel boy. In my heart always.

Love,
Mommy

10 months...

Hello baby boy, I am sorry I havent been writing to you very often. But you know I think of you every moment of everyday. I miss you so very much and wish you could be here with me. I know you are here with me and Daddy always but I wish we could hold you and see you. Your little brother is getting so big, he weighs 3lbs 11oz as of last week. We are expecting him in 6 and a half more weeks. Its coming fast but not fast enough. I can not believe its been 10 months since I held you and kissed your beautiful face. Oh how I miss that sweet innocent face, and what I would give to be able to see it again. I love you my precious son. I came to visit you a few weeks ago, it was nice just to sit and talk with you. Your little plant that Mary brought you is getting big and has nice pretty yellow flowers on it. Its so unfair that in a few short weeks your brother will be here and you wont be here to see him and play with him. (I am trying to stay positive that he will be joining us.) He will know you though, daddy and I will make sure of that. You will never be forgotten. Every year we plan on doing a something special for you on your birthday. This year I am not sure yet what we are going to be doing. I want to come visit you and bring some of the same flowers we had for your funeral and have balloons and maybe bubbles and bring you gifts. I am thinking of making a cake or buying one that has Nemo or something I think you would be into right now. If you can somehow tell me what you would like i'll get it for you. I still want to have little birthdays for you because you deserve them just as much as anyone else. You are still very much a part of our lives even though your home is in Heaven, we want you to know we are celebrating your life here on earth too. We know the birthday party you have in Heaven will be grand and we can not imagine it but we will be celebrating with you here. We love and miss you sweet boy and wish everyday that you could be here to comfort us and be with us, but we know your purpose was to be in Heaven doing what God needed you to do. Say hello to everyone there for us. We love and miss you so very much son and send you love and hugs everyday. Please stay close to your little brother, he is coming soon. We need you by our sides to get us through, to comfort us and calm our nerves. I love you baby boy. Hugs and kisses.

Love,
Mommy