Thank you Franchesca!

Songs for peanut

Get a playlist! Standalone player Get Ringtones

Friday, June 15, 2012

4 years gone....

I am so far late on posting this but I want to get it down before I start forgetting.
Note: You wont see Jacen in any of these photos because he was asleep in the car, he wasnt feeling very good.
                                                                     Our little angel.
                                                                 Kayleigh and Daddy
                                                        Grandma O releasing her balloon with Kayleigh's help.
                                                         Grandpa O releasing his balloon.
                                         Balloons from mommy, daddy, Jacen and Kayleigh.
                                                       Roses from Mommy and Kayleigh.
                                                            Kayleigh helping lay her rose
                                                                        Jay's butterfly.
                                                                Daddy and Jacen's rose.
                                                        Grandma O and Uncle Steven's rose
                                                                   Grandpa O's rose
       Roses from Gramma, Grandpa V, Aunt Vicki, Uncle Terry , Aunt Cylina and cousins Ethan, Liam and Olivia.

                                                        Lighting our candles in his memory.
To think that our lives changed in this way 4 years ago is unimaginable. I never thought I would be sitting here 4 years later with 2 beautiful children and one angel in Heaven. All because God had a different plan for us. For Jay. To say that I have healed, gone on, or moved on is just not true. Every day I think about that night and what I wish I would have done, what I wish I would have known. Every day I think about what I wish I would have known just the day before his fate changed. I think about his funeral and the preparations we had to began making right out of the hospital. Every day I think about what he would be like as an adventurous little boy like this little brother. To think that this is the way we have to celebrate his birthdays is heartbreaking. But we will celebrate his life until my last breath. He will not be forgotten, ever. He has so many people that love him, I cant help but smile when I think about what a beautiful Angel he is. 4 years gone, 4 years I have missed him, 1460 days have gone by and my arms have ached for him every one of those days. I have missed the smell of his sweet skin, I have missed the feel of him wiggling inside me. I have missed his heart beating under my own heart. Every single second I have missed him, and that will never change......

Happy 4th birthday in Heaven my love.

No comments:

October 15th Video (Baby Jay is in this one)....


Blog designed by Blogger Boutique using Danielle Engebretson's "Aurora" kit.